Day Twenty One: Floating Evidence

 You know what's amazing about a camera? Well, I'll tell you. Cameras are great at capturing moments. They capture the times of joy, times of pain. The emotions painted in the photograph allow us to remember what happened before the present. Even if we are are not apart of the photo in any way, our emotions some how make it so we are. Moments/ Memories flood our mind as we look one second at a photograph. Oh, what a beautiful sensation! I also find written word a beautiful source that brings back memories. Journals, novels, or just plain notes about your thoughts. Notes from dear friends, or friends from the past. Words and photographs won't allow us to forget. They are floating evidence that you have lived many days before this.

Day Twenty: January

I have had a lot to think about this month. New goals, new wishes. I have thought a lot about what I believe in and the person I am becoming. I have had new challenges. I am a new person every day, unsure of what I am going to say or do. It's fine because in the end, I am happy with where my life is headed. I have experimented a lot of new things. I've gained a greater respect for God's creations, my friends, and even more for myself.

I have enjoyed the sparatic days when the sun warmed the earth. I have enjoyed the many parties and get together's that have brightened my weekends, the chance to start driving without an adult in the car. The chance to set new goals and be who I want to be.

Enjoy your last day of January.
Lahve always,
Madison

p.s. At the bottom of my playlist, there is a song that is new to my playlist. It's called Listen to Your Heart. You may have already heard of it, but that's okay. I suggest you listen to it. It's my favorite.

Day Nineteen: Regrets

I have plenty of regrets. The eat me away, sometimes to the point where I don't think I can take it anymore. There is one regret that keeps coming back to me. It is the one regret that I can't seem to get rid of or control. 

My regret is:

Words. 

I'm a human that struggles with saying the right things to others,  judgmental thoughts, and making sense. I sometimes can't find the words to describe my emotions or experiences. Sometimes I think too hard about what to say that I miss my opportunity to say it. When I say hurtful words, I wish there was some way to shove them back into my mouth and try to re-say it, but in a way that isn't so hurtful. I regret conversations that are awkward, and I didn't do a thing to make it un-awkward.

I deal with this regret every day. I am human. I try to be better, but I slip up sometimes. 

Feel good about yourself and don't regret a thing. (I should listen to my own advice)

Lahve always,

Madison

Day Eighteen: Happy Birthday, Lovely

More like Happy UNBirthday! Oh and don't forget to make a wish on your candle. 

I blogged about my favorite birthday (Definitely Surprised). Remember? Yeah, well it was a few months ago. 

I love birthdays, or more like I love the parties. I don't like it for the gifts and the food, although those things are great. I love that it brings everyone together for a happy reason. It give you a chance to be social and laugh.  

Happy Birthday.

Love yourself.

Lahve always,

Madison

Day Seventeen: I Can't Pick Just One

Okay. I can't just pick one favorite memory. It's just too hard. If I were to pick one, I would think about it for hours on end. Then, I would realize that it isn't my absolute favorite memory and I would go and change it. This cycle would just keep going and never end so... how about I just describe what makes a perfect favorite memory? Yep, that will have to do.

 This is a matter of opinion so you don't need to agree with me. It's fine.

[For me] Life's best memories are fairly simple. They don't always have to cost a fortune. Now I'm not saying that expensive trips are no fun. If I said that, I would be lying. But the simplicity of the moment makes everything spectacular. Simple things like: a guy twirling you while you slow dance, laying on the creek trail with your gal friends, soaking in the sun; realizing your strength/ability and run ten miles, pinning flowers on your date as you get ready to go to a formal dance, walking along the beach, shoeless, picking up any sand dollars that appear to still be whole; studying and learning about your passions in life (not to be confused with the stuff that teachers shovel down your throat); dancing and/or singing to your favorite music (while your alone in your room), talking and/or thinking to yourself, and the list goes on.

The simple things allow you to remember that you are breathing and that you are human. You are enjoying life.

Live life to the fullest.
Lahve always,
Madison

Day Sixteen: My First Kiss

I wish I could say I have been kissed, but that would be a lie. The truth is, I can only dream of my first kiss. When I experience my first kiss, it will be beautiful- oh so beautiful.

That's all I have to say about that.

Lahve always,
Madison

Day Fifteen: Dreams

I watched the movie A Walk To Remember today. I decided to do the same thing Jamie did in the movie- make a list of life ambitions. Ain't it ironic that that is basically what today's post is about?

My dream is to find my prince. Grab a white dress and suit, and both of us will end the day wearing simply beautiful rings. We will be married in the beautiful castle in Salt Lake and be together forever- even after death.

I dream of one day becoming a professional photographer. Taking pictures of other peoples' beautiful wedding days. And let's not forget, I will take pictures of my beautiful kids. They will have to learn to be photogenic because I am their mother, and I take billions of pictures.

Some simple dreams...
Like Jamie, I would like to be in two places at once.
I would like to spend this next summer, fearless, carless, and shoeless.
I would like to spend everyday of my life laughing with my friends.

The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.

-Eleanor Roosevelt

Dream Big.

Lahve always,
Madison

Mine

I lay on my bed, breathing. I decide to pull out my old shoe box. I open the first envelope. Inside are pictures of us making mud pies and castles, and others of us dressed up: you, a super hero/cowboy; and me, a lovely princess. 

Then, after looking at every photograph, I put them back inside the envelope and grab another envelope. Inside this envelope is pictures of us dresses up for the sixth grade valentines dance. You have a few grass stains from recess football on your sunday-white shirt, and I am wearing sneakers because I dislike looking fancy/frilly. There is also pictures of us covered in sand, head to toe.

I carefully place the photos back in their envelope and pull out another one. This one has senior year. There are photos of us after running marathons. You're President of the student body. I perform in choir concerts. And of course, senior prom. We are both looking our very best- this time, you don't have any grass stains from recess football, and I am wearing heels (so that I don't look super short next to you). Both of us are smiling big.

Before I open the last, massive envelope, I gaze down at my left ring finger. I smile as my diamond reflects in the sun.

You're the best thing

 that has ever been mine.

Day Fourteen: Again.

I swear I just did this post! Yeah, I did. Four days ago.
That's okay.
Again, I don't find it important to tell you what I am wearing.

Can I just say I am addicted to photography? Yes, it's true. Everything I think always ends up being related to photography in some way. This summer I plan on putting together a shoebox full of photos. My favorites. Summer memories. Best smiles.

The sun came out today. It is getting warmer. I always hear that it gets warm before the storm. I hope that's not true. I just want it to be warmer.

Don't be afraid to take chances.

Lahve always,

Madison

Day Thirteen: This Beautiful Week

Let's just say that this week was great... no more like this weekend was great.
Oh-ho Preference!!!

This is me and my preference date, Connor.

Aren't we Lahvely! ;)

We had a blast!

This week was the beginning of a new semester. Goodness, I needed a fresh start! After a few class changes with my irritated counselor, I now have all the perfect classes! So far, so great. Let's just hope it stays that way...

Thank you to my Preference Mothers: I couldn't have survived with out all y'all!

Thank you Preference Date Groupies: Hmmm, what a beautiful day. I couldn't wish for a better date.

Thank you Connor: for saying yes and giving me a beautiful night.

Thank you Dad: I asked for your opinion and you gave me a beautiful compliment. It made my night!

Thank you Mom: thanks for talking to me on the phone, and giving me advice. I miss ya tons and can't wait for you to come home!

Thank you to anyone that I may of missed: Thank you, thank you.

This week was a beautiful one (hence the post title).

Thank You.

Lahve always,

Madison

Oh and P.S. I drove for the first time without an adult in the car!! Please be proud of me.

Day Twelve: In the Bag

What would you do if you saw someone with a purse like this?

I wish my purse looked like this....

In my purse...
-Chapstick: at least 10 sticks...
- Scotch Tape
- Wallet (and yes, it does hold a drivers license- mine to be exact)
- Breath mints/ Gum (it depends what I buy- sometimes both and sometimes just gum or mints)
- Lotion
-Mini Book of Mormon (it makes me giggle)
-Notebook/Journal (whatev you want to call it)

Day Eleven: Siblings

McKayla
-Hilarious (especially when she speaks spanish...)
-Insane Basketball Player
-Beautiful Smile

Brayden

-Stud (ugh, it's gross...)

-Football Player

- Gentleman

Kenedi

-Always smiling and giggling

-Friend to everyone (no matter the age)

-Girl with a spunky personality

Reagan

-Can't stop singing

  (and yet she isn't quite sure if she wants to sing in school/church choir...)

-Full of energy

-Always looks beautiful

Day Ten: Oh goodness, really?

I wish I could dress something like this. (above)
Simple. And. Beautiful.

Let's just say, I didn't really care what I wore today. I wore a gray cardigan and a light blue tank underneath. I wore my least favorite jeans. Gray socks, gray converse. Its okay.

My mom left for Washington today. I am sorta jealous. I love the air, rain, and all the green; I am going to miss it when my grandparents move to Utah. I just hope all goes well up there.

Day Nine: I Believe

For your enjoyment,  here is a list of thing I believe in (in no particular order):

1) I believe God is there. He loves us and wants us to be happy.

2)I believe Everyone is beautiful in their own way- including myself. 

3)I believe A photograph speaks a thousand-plus words.

4)I believe In wishing wishes, dreaming dreams.

5)I believe People shouldn't be afraid to be themselves.

6)I believe Telling yourself that your going to be happy everyday makes you happy- everyday.

7) I believe Laughter is the best sound.

8)I believe Music is the greatest food for the soul- and chocolate.

9)I believe Talking/thinking with yourself is very therapeutic. 

10)I believe in writing in your journal. Telling it your stories and secrets- they won't tell a soul unless you let them.

11)I believe Every girl deserves a romance- their "Happily Ever After"- including moi.

12)I believe Breathing in and seeing nature is therapeutic.

13)I believe in good writing, beautiful pieces of art.

14)I believe smiling and laughing is healthy.

15)I believe in running. It helps me clear my mind.

16)I believe no one should be afraid to cry when they need to.

There is to many too list and too many too many to remember. That's okay. I think this will do. 

Believe in yourself.

Lahve always,

Madison

Day Eight: Just a Moment

The other day my brother asked me to help him make his lunch. It took me a while to get started on it because I was in the middle of doing something. When I finally got on his sandwich I realized that it was 1:11PM. Oh yeah, I freaked out and yelled, "MAKE A WISH!!" I squeezed my eyes shut, getting ready to wish. My brother got impatient and decided to start making his sandwich. He was sick and I couldn't allow that so I put my wish aside and helped him. By the time I turned around to make my wish, it was 1:13PM.
"Thanks A LOT, Brayden!" I said sarcastically.
Then there was a slight pause, a silence.
"sorry..." he replied.
I tried so hard not to laugh, but that didn't last very long.
He seriously asked me, "What?"
"Nothing... {snicker, snicker}..."
To try to make me "feel better" he said, "Well if you wait ten more minutes, you can make another wish- 1+2=3 (1:23PM)!"
I never remembered that wish. Oops.

Day Seven: Surrounded by Beauty

Dani: Insanely stylish. She's extremely talented, although she claims she isn't. Violin, Piano, Dancing, Singing- what can't you do Dani? I love her full name, Danielle- it fits her perfectly. Likes to take long walks, and while she walks, she sings.

Brenna: Has the best freckles in the whole world. She is extremely talented with clay. Her laugh is insanely contagious. She could be a model if she wanted to be.

Brynn: Hilarious. She is an exquisite writer, which makes me tremendously jealous. She has inspired me to do write in my journal. She has many plans full of adventure that brings me happiness.

Marisa: Oh my, Marisa! She has been my dearest friend since 3rd grade. I have always been jealous of her artisticness (yep, in know it isn't a real word- it is now.) Her imagination is always running wild. She has a drop-dead gorgeous smile. Her kindness makes me look bad. It's fine.

"We'll be Friends Forever, won't we, Pooh?" asked Piglet.

"Even longer," Pooh answered.

Lahve always,

Madison

Day Six: Beautiful Day

Today was beautiful.

Not anything spectacularly different.

Just beautiful.

Best things I did today:

-Read the footnotes in my scriptures

-Turned on some cozy lamps in my room. I read for a while then took a beautiful nap.

-Didn't bother to care what my hair looked like today.

Funny things that happened today:

 boy belting "I am a Child of God" in sacrament meeting-

Watching Kenedi's nose flare as she laughed-

Reagan saying "yeehaw" to our home teachers about the sarcasm of an extended lesson-

A scripture that came to my mind several times this past week or so describes my day perfectly (since it is Sunday, I think it is appropriate to share this scripture...)

Alma 37:6

"... but behold I say unto you, that by small and simple things are great things brought to pass..."

By the simple beauties and laughs, a great day is brought to pass.

Live life happy.

Lahve always,

Madison

Day Five: Definition of LAHVE

Love is what brings family closer, what keeps friends laughing. The two "f" words you can't live without.

Love is a stranger who pulls over to help you change the tire on your car.
Love is a dear friend who listens to your nonsense.
Love is what makes and sometimes brakes a girls heart.
Love is simplicity.
Love is the sound of the man's voice that makes me melt.
Love is the sound of laughter.
Love is the tears that you shed for another human being.
Love is adventure.
Love is the adrenaline you feel when you try something new.

To my friends:
I love you guys. Really, it's no joke. You add color to my black and white photograph. Your tears are my tears. Your joys are my joys, too. You guys help me realize the beauty and simplicity that is all around me. You allow me to adventure, try something new. I trust you. You are great. You are awesome- you have the most amazing smile (Validation)

To my family:
I love you. I would be nothing without you. Our frustrations and the pain we feel only makes us closer. With you, I can be anything I want and I don't have to worry about being too much of anything. We are all odd with many differences, but we come together to make one lovely family. You are my friends- some of my bests. Don't change. Don't leave. Let's be a forever family.

Give love. Take love. Be love.
Lahve always,
Madison

Day Four: What Did Ya Eat?

Do you really want to know what I ate? I don't think anyone does...
Yeah so let's just say I ate cinnamon toast for breakfast and move on to a regular blog post.

It feels great to find yourself beautiful. You excuse every one else's opinion and choose to live by your own. You use your imagination with every step you take. You don't forget to smile- it just comes naturally.  Your not afraid to share the style with those around you.

Feel Beautiful.
Lahve always,
Madison

Day Three: Got to Lahve these WEIRDalls....

If you wanted to get to know the strangest people I know, these two would probably be it.

My dad has a beautiful smile. His laugh is more like a wheeze, a search for air, but I must admit: it is quite contagious. He can answer any question you ask him. If he doesn't know the answer (which is extremely rare) he'll Google it for you. He is constantly making cheesy jokes, making it impossible to be bored at our home. He makes the best cookie dough and homemade bread. Some days, he will come home from work and say, "Hey I worked out today, can you tell?" Uh... yeah, dad...

My mom is always running. Running outside, running errands. She is always working hard to make sure our family is running the right way. She is very creative. She always knows how to make you laugh. Unlike my dad, she struggles to work the computer. It's hilarious to just sit there and watch her try to work things out ;) Sometimes you wouldn't know she is 43- She tends to act like a teenager. She is very social and headstrong.  She has a killer whistle that I believe will make me deaf one day.

You can never be bored with these crazy kids at home (oh, does that make you feel young? sorry, you're not ;). When you get them together, they go crazy. They make life at home colorful. Moving out after high school is going to be harder than I thought.

Ma, Pa,
I lahve ya.
Don't forget it.

Lahve always,
Madison

Day Two: First Love

I am different from everybody else. (Duh.)

Okay, let me be more specific. I was never one of those girls that went around crushin' on every boy she met. You see, I don't ever remember actually loving a boy. Now that I am in high school, I have changed. I am still not the go-around-and-crush-on-every-boy-you-meet type of girl, but love had a different meaning for me. I have friends. Guy friends. If he is always kind to me, I may end up liking him more than I originally planned. That's how it goes.  I don't just like the guy for looks. I like him for the way he treats me and those around him. 

These last few days, weeks, I have thought about guys I've liked. At the time, I convinced myself that I didn't really like anyone at the moment. But that's when I realized that's a lie. I have sort of fallin' in love with this kid I never thought I would ever fall in love with. He's slightly dirty (only slightly). But whenever he talks to me, he talks to me like a friend. He may say some rude/crude things to other people, but never to me. It's nice.

But let's not talk about that... I have already said enough... MORE than enough...

For day two, I wanted to share a story from when I was young. The first time someone loved me. First Grade. At first, we were just friends. We would work on every project together, eat lunch together, talk together at recess. (Ha- funny story- we would eat lunch together, then go to the bathroom to wash our hands. Since we were different genders we had to separate to our bathrooms to wash our hands. Whoever would finish first would wait in between the bathrooms, waiting, waiting for the other one to finish.) You could say that we were best friends.

Then, before I knew it, people were snickering and teasing. That's when I finally realized that maybe we weren't just friends- to him at least. That's when I considered that maybe he did like me... 

People continued to tease and our friendship was torn apart. I don't like him like that anymore, but I admit, it would be nice if we were still friends.

So I kinda sorta think I might like you a tiny speck of a bit more than I originally planned, said the Maddiey who is quoting MissLindy. (sorry Brynn, I just had to steal that way of quoting from ya...it's slightly different so it should be ok...)

Lahve always,

Madison

Day One: Introduce Yourself

Okay, here we go...
I try to make life amazing. I take in every moment, considering it perfect- I would have it no other way than the way it happened. I love romance oh-so much, but I try to keep myself from getting to caught up in the "perfect"  or fairytales that only comes in novels. Some say I will never die because I laugh so much. That's a lie. I will probably end up dying of laughter.

Since you already know me,  I am going share some secrets I have told no one instead boring you with things you already know. Some are more fears than secrets, but oh well.


Secret: I am excited for the life that is farther away on my path of life. But even more than that, I am scared to grow old(er). I have nothing against old people, in fact, I love them. I just don't want to think of my abilities to do things being limited (because I am old).


Secret: I love loving. When I meet the right man, I will marry him. I will love him. Although I want love to last forever, I am horribly scared it won't.


Secret: I hate obsessions. They may seem good at first, but in the end they just tear you apart. Once I find myself starting to become obsessed, I regret even loving- whatever it is- in the first place. I would rather just love.

Now that I have shared my secrets, please don't be afraid to share yours. Leave a comment- share a secret.

Lahve always,
Madison

my dearest readers

my dearest readers,
first off, i would like to thank you for actually reading my blog. little do you know, it means a lot to me.
2nd, i would like to ask you a favor.
please, please, PAHLEEZE, leave comments. i don't care if they are lame- they would only be lame to you- just leave a comment. now i hope that isn't a lot to ask of y'all... i promise to leave comments on your blog as long as you return the favor by doing so on my blog.

I lahve y'all lots! Don't forget that!

Lahve always,
Maddiey

oh p.s. please don't be afraid to follow my blog

every girl needs romance

  

this one is for you Marisa Oswald- one who 

thinks even two blades of grass can be in love

Romance is like chocolate- women love it and can't seem to live without it. (i made that up... i personally think it is a good one!) 

Every girl needs romance. Just sayin'. Last night I watched a movie- can you guess what kind of movie? Yep. Romance. I have seen the movie before, but for some reason it ten times better this time! I guess it's because I haven't read/watched any romances yet this year. Yesterday was the first. It was so good I cried. Well, almost. I stopped myself before it got weird.

My mom challenged me to read books that don't involve any romance. It is one of the hardest things I have ever done! I've attempted this one book at least three different times. It's difficult but I am doing it. It will definitely be something I will be proud of.

love always,

Maddiey

hmmm...

tears, twinkle lights, and confusion

 my mom said it was time to put my
twinkle lights away.
i am very sad.

 it was a eerie to think that school was truly back in session. (eheew, don't even mention it, Maddiey!) i am still on strike with grammar- okay, all except for when i am in english...

as fourth period ended, i walked solemnly down the hallway by myself. at first i wasn't thinking about much, and that's when i realized something odd (odd is my new word... for a little while...). i realized i didn't remember ever coming to school this morning! i was a little confused how i got inside the school ( i wonder if my face showed it... people probably found it funny). i had to convince myself that Brenna's mom gave me a ride to school, which really did happen. when i reached the end of the hallyway (oh wow... i am not going to delete that hilarious mistake... hehe.), i met up with brynn. it was an odd greeting. i was still trying to figure things out. i am not sure what fried my brain. it must be the new year and new adjustments. (Maddiey, you better adjust quick!!!)

i desperately want to drive. but i know that with all the ice, there is no way my mom would want me to take the car. one day i would like to get my own car. a junky car. old fashion. yes, i want an old fashion, junky car.

i have to laugh at my almost-ten-year-old sister, Kenedi. she is trying to understand the fact that Joseph isn't Jesus' father- Heavenly Father is. She understood that Heavenly Father was Jesus' father but she kept getting her Josephs mixed up. She was confusing Joseph (Jesus' half-father) with Joseph Smith. She said, "So there's two Josephs? One is Joseph Smith and the other is Mary's Joseph?" I find it funny that she called him "Mary's Joseph."

be happy and try not to get confused.

lahve always,

Madison

p.s. friends, just because i  sign the end of my blog with Madison doesn't mean i want to be called that. please still call me Maddiey

p.p.s. i got a new light bulb for my reading lamp.

hello world

hello world,

welcome to the new year.

i love new years. it's a chance to become new. a new you. its a chance to put behind your past completely and just look forward. i don't believe in the whole write-down-your-goals deal. we all know that we end up writing down more goals than we can handle and we forget more than  half of them by the middle of february. just live them! don't write them down- live them!

i've decided that with this new year i am not going to care what people think of me- their opinion doesn't matter anymore. i am going let out the me that i have been nervous to let out. i may be odd, but who cares? 

dear old self,

 SEE-YUH!!!

dear new self,

hello! it's nice to finally meet you!


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