fall[ing] rain.

.

And out they come.

The slippers all throughout my room start to peek out of their hiding places. Some pairs linger on the carpet of my bedroom floor more than others- I like to pick favorites. Matched with a large fleece blanket, they make my miserably cold body feel somewhat more comfortable.
And a flip of the switch.
As the temperature falls, it becomes clear that leaving my window open only makes life in the basement  more miserable. With a flip of the switch, I can get an artificial fire burning to keep my limbs toasty warm. I will attempt to read a book as I lounge on the cuddle bag extremely to the fireplace. I always end up choosing to fall asleep instead.
And the steam rises.
It is an obvious fact that hot chocolate taste better made with warm milk rather than boiled water. The creamy chocolate is an amazing sensation as you feel it running through your body from the minute you swallow it. Drinking the hot chocolate on your porch or by a window makes it taste extra spectacular- it doesn't really, but yet it really does make it taste better.
And they turn the color blue.
The gloves go on, sleeves pulled down, and hands stuffed in my pockets. My hands loose their fleshy color and begin to turn into ice cold rocks. Like vampires' hands, but we aren't going there.The cold disables me from writing legibly for the next hour or so. It causes my hands to swell up to the point where it looks like a plastic glove filled with air, ready to burst any minute.


And now I am ready for fall.
Farewell, Steve Jobs.
Avec Amour,
Maddiey

another year gone by.

I've changed. For the better, I hope, but some may beg to differ. 

I ask myself: Is it possible for a person to change so much in one year? Apparently so. But to tell you the truth, I am happy with the change that so rapidly happened in a year. My views on certain opinions dramatically changed and some may have found that to make me a hypocritical person. I don't care so much about what people think of me anymore. 

I dance when nobody's looking. I dance when everybody is watching. 

I sing to my Self. I sing when people are listening. 

I cry. 

I read books other than romance novels. I read in libraries. 

I amuse my Self. 

I occasionally walk barefoot. 

I've gone green and use a lunch box rather than using brown sacks. 

I am working harder at remembering to recycle paper. 

I enjoy sleeping in general and taking long naps in the afternoon. 

I have accepted the fact that I am not as tan as I was last year. 

I rather enjoy reading the newspaper and read who's birthday it is everyday. 

I write in cursive. 

I enjoy being by myself every once in a while. 

I love rooftop concerts.

I speak some French.

I like what I have become.

F-O-X.

Avec Amour,

Madison 

it tastes like soap but it doesn't really taste like soap.

And then I lower my whole mouth in and take a gulp.

I am overly excited for fall this year.

I am excited for

the cardigans 

and the scarfs 

and the boots.

I am excited for

long walks through the park

and the color changing mountains

and a little bit of cold air.

I am excited for

a change in season

and a change in scenery.

My favorite movie reminds me of fall. It almost seems appropriate to watch it in the fall and no other season but fall. Of course I will watch it in other seasons, but my favorite way to enjoy fall is to cuddle up every once in a while and watch this movie. I'll give you quotes from this movie (hopefully something I haven't already quoted) and I want you to guess what it is (feel free to leave your guess in a comment): p.s. Dani, wait till others have guessed first. You already know what movie I'm talking about.

"The whole purpose of places like Starbucks is for people with no decision-making ability whatsoever to make six decisions just to buy one cup of coffee. Short, tall, light, dark, caf, decaf, low-fat, non-fat, etc. So people who don't know what the [heck] they're doing or who on earth they are can, for only $2.95, get not just a cup of coffee but an absolutely defining sense of self: Tall. Decaf. Cappuccino." 

"A HOTDOG is singing. You need quiet while a hotdog is singing? "


"You are a lone reed, standing tall, waving boldly in the corrupt sands of commerce."

I'm a lone reed.
Avec Amour,

Maddiey 

crooked souls.

It seems as though everything I knew to be pleasing and lovely has suddenly swapped with the hideous and the unwanted. I am not sure what to think anymore. I am doing things I never would have imagined my Self to do the days previous to this one. I have cried more painful tears and remained calm which is not my normal way of living. I have almost forgotten what it's like to laugh to the point where I think I might need a change of pants.

I am a crooked soul trying ever so hard to stay up straight.

9.11.

It is crazy to think that it has been ten years since that day.

I think I was too young to comprehend what was really happening, but looking back I do remember those who were around me at that time were devastated and I couldn't help but feel the same way.

It was interesting to read articles in the newspaper today and to see the different perspectives and stories from the different journalists.

I am reminded of the country song by Darryl Worley, Have You Forgotten? (First song on my playlist below.)

This day has more meaning for me today than it did ten years ago; I am older and can understand the devastation with more meaning.

God bless America.

you are not that ugly.

"Ew, I hate my picture!"

"I'm so doing retakes!"

"OMGosh, your picture looks so much better than mine!"

"Come on, BFF, let's see your picture! Come on! Let me see it! It cannot be as bad as mine!"

bleh.

There are two days of the beginning of the school year that drive me crazier than my newly-teenbop brother on a bad day. Those days happen to be picture day.

Come on, let's be honest. We all know that you absolutely love yourself in that picture. You are the one who curls your hair in perfect curls and had your outfit picked out since the first day of summer. You are the one who double-frosted that caked-on makeup on your petit face so you look like a person I've never seen before. You even wear a nice pair of skinny jeans and your most stylish pair of high heels. Like you can actually see them.
Right before your picture is taken, you pull out your mini mirror, touch up your makeup, cake on luscious lipgloss, and ask the boys standing next to you, "How do I look?"
When you get your ID card, you walk straight to your friends (or at least someone who will respond the way you want them to) and say the quoted sentences above (beginning of this post).

And then there's me.

Eh, I should probably wear a shirt... yeah, that could be good....

NAH, just joking with ya. I wear a shirt that is one step fancier than a t-shirt. I only wore a skirt today because it happened to be Wednesday (aka Temple Day). I straightened my hair- not to fancy and not to plain. I put on the amount of makeup that the above person would consider it to be the equivalent of being naked.

I get my picture taken.
Grab ID card.
Wait for class to finish.
Pretend to listen to people get mad about their picture.
Go back to class.

Now I can check out a book from the school library.
Avec Amour,
Maddiey
post script: I got a letter from "Army Man" (aka Breton) today. Whoop whoop.

I'm going (most likely)!

Everywhere I go, I think of all the possible ways he could kiss me.